Lower the bar

We often intentionally keep ourselves from feeling good about our day-to-day progress. We save that tap on the back or that feeling of success for our truly great achievements: a big promotion, setting a personal record in fitness, or finishing a major piece of art.

We perhaps sometimes treat the feeling of success as if it were a scarce commodity or something that might corrupt us. We worry that feeling too good about ourselves will make us lazy or complacent. We starve ourselves of that feeling of success now to motivate ourselves to do something truly audacious and ambitious.

Put simply, we set our bar for what makes us feel successful or proud very high.

If this sounds like you, I have an experiment for you: For the next week or so, try lowering that bar as low as you possibly can, lower than feels responsible or reasonable. Be exceedingly generous with yourself. Flood your system with a sense of success. Find the smallest, most inconsequential positive steps forward and celebrate them. Find as many as you possibly can.

First, I think you’ll notice that this feeling is in no way scarce. You’re at no risk of it running out. Second, I think you’ll find that your mental health and general enjoyment of life are vastly improved.

But more than all that, I think you might find that feeling successful has an alluring, habit-forming quality. You will naturally be drawn to do whatever makes you feel successful and proud of yourself. And if you can make the practices that move you forward a part of your routine, then you have the basis for transforming your life.


Coach, writer, and recovering hustle hero. I help purpose-driven humans do good in the world in dark times - without the burnout.


More Antiheroes' Blog posts


  • Hollywood McMyth

    Hollywood McMyth

    The hero's journey, it turns out, is not as universal as we imagine. It is a Western, individualist story dressed up as one. It is,…


  • The hero’s journey

    The hero’s journey

    Joseph Campbell's 1949 book The Hero with a Thousand Faces argued that many of humanity's most famous stories share a common narrative blueprint that resonates…


  • Burnout for the purpose-driven

    Burnout for the purpose-driven

    The elusive "social impact" has just become another object of our lust and greed. And when we can never quite achieve enough impact, the burnout…