The Earth against white background, from article on "Letting Go of Should"

The world isn’t supposed to be anything

Humans have a miraculous ability to envision new, better worlds. We constantly compare how the world is now to how we think it could be. No other creature we know of can do this.

Why imagining a better world also causes suffering

In many ways, this is an incredible gift. It inspires us to dream up and build a brighter future and constantly evolve ourselves. It often offers a sense of meaning, purpose, and possibility.

But this gift is also the source of a lot of unnecessary pain. We can so easily imagine the world that we think we should have or is supposed to be. It can be infuriating and discouraging to see how far away we are from this idealized conception of our minds. For many of us, this feeling is now perhaps stronger than ever, given the daily barrage of foolishness and cruelty in these dark times.

The difference between “could” and “should”

My invitation is to keep dreaming and earnestly building that better world of your dreams. That is meaningful, important work. But perhaps you can let go of the idea that the world is supposed to be the way you want it to be. The world isn’t actually supposed to be anything. It is what it is. It is whatever we decide to make it.

Acceptance isn’t giving up — it’s freeing energy for the work

Once we stop believing we are owed the world we want or are somehow shameful or broken for not collectively realizing the world we believe should be, we offer ourselves a greater sense of peace and acceptance that can be an important balm in troubled times. But we also free up the energy we need to do something meaningful to create that brighter future.


Coach, writer, and recovering hustle hero. I help purpose-driven humans do good in the world in dark times - without the burnout.


More Antiheroes' Blog posts


  • Making the implicit explicit

    Making the implicit explicit

    So much of personal growth is working to make implicit memories explicit. We revisit past repressed traumas so they don’t act on us unconsciously anymore.…


  • Positivity vs. negativity

    Positivity vs. negativity

    So many of us who want to do good in the world come from a paradigm of excess positivity. We go, go, go. We keep…


  • It’s not just the right brain that’s creative

    It’s not just the right brain that’s creative

    It may not be as big and shiny as your friends and colleagues. It may not garner the acclaim as others. It may not be…